In the age of the Internet and social media, I think self-comparison is one of the biggest issues that surrounds us and not enough people talk about. For the younger generation especially, a lot of the time spent online is to catch up with the latest and greatest on social media and not enough time focusing on ourselves.
I admit, I struggled with self-comparison almost everyday and I still do. Most of the time I’d do it subconsciously. I didn’t even realise that the reason I felt down was because I was envious of someone else’s feed or what someone else is doing. It just happened and I could never put my finger on what’s made me feel that way, maybe I was quite stubborn. It can feel quite mentally draining when you come to terms with the fact that you feel down because you’re wishing your life away whilst admiring others.
However, I can also admit how maturity and taking a step back from it all has meant I use that time to focus on myself. Instead of trawling through people’s social feeds and seeing what I can’t do, I focus on what I can do and that time is so precious and worthwhile.
If you think about it, if you are reading this and nodding your head, agreeing that you compare yourself to others, then maybe someone out there is comparing themselves to you? I always think about it that way and is one of the things that makes me stop. Focusing on bettering yourself is time better spent.
Here are some things I do to get me out of the self-comparison cycle:
– When I feel the ‘jealousy’ feeling coming, I put down my phone. As simple as this sounds I never used to do it enough. Instead I’d continue to pee myself off and wind myself up, and really, what am I gaining from that? Nothing at all, you’re right. But I was definitely wasting my time.
– Take a day off from it. Sometimes I feel social media can put a lot of pressure on us, even for the smallest reasons. I for one am quite obsessed with my phone and I’m on it very often, it’s such a bad habit I know but sometimes I just cant help myself. A few weeks back I told myself to have a day off from it. During those hours of the day I had nothing to do, I’d go to the gym, chat with my mum or just read instead. Taking time off from social media is honestly so beneficial if you feel quite anxious when you use it, even if it is just for a day.
– Do something for myself. I’ve said many times how I love to walk, whether it’s into town or around where I live, I just love the fresh air as it gives me time to de-stress. In the those times where I feel self-comparison is putting me down I always make time for myself and do something I love. This helps you focus on you and makes you realise how self-focus is so much more inspiring than self-comparison.
This post isn’t saying to stop admiring others, as sharing the love is just as important, but comparing yourself to what others have is pointless and gets you nowhere. Focus on yourself for the next few hours and see how good it makes you feel. My message is: self-comparison puts the focus on the wrong person.
What do you do to self-focus instead of self-compare?