Something happened to me a few weeks ago that has never happened before.
It’s not that I got lazy, I just had a little brain fart and just needed some time away from it all. The online sphere just takes over sometimes and gets a bit too much, doesn’t it? It happens to us all and a few weeks ago it was my turn.
I had daily blogged every single day since the first day of 2017. Not only was I in the swing of it, I was really enjoying myself. Even at the time when I decided to take just a short step back and have some time off from it, I had posts ready to go and a huge list of content ideas. Its not that I didn’t feel inspired and I hadn’t run out of ideas, it just hit me that I needed a lil break. A little break to clear my mind.
It happened the day I got home from holiday. Before I went away I worked my socks off to get content prepped, ready and scheduled for the 2 weeks I was away. I was on a roll. But, when I got home time started whizzing by and before I knew it, I hadn’t blogged for over a week. Sounds little to some but I was so in the swing of doing it every single day, I felt really bad. But why? Why did I feel bad? Everyone needs a break once in a while. I’m just one of those people that feels they need a strict routine. And, in the short amount of time I had off I constantly asked myself these questions…
Why am I so strict on myself?
Is a strict schedule really necessary?
And – why did I not want to take a break sooner?
Those same questions were going round in my head time and time again and that’s when it hit me. I really need to be easier on myself.
When it dawned on me that as humans we are way too hard on ourselves, I decided to stop questioning myself and come to terms with the answers. If I don’t stick to something I feel like I’ve failed, and thats not a healthy outlook on life.
Stupid isn’t it?
If I didn’t meet my deadline or didn’t tick the last thing off my daily to do list, I’d tell myself I could’ve done better. I’d sit and think about it, sometimes keeping me up late at night. Thankfully, this little time off has given me enough headspace to give myself a much accutane needed kick up the butt to make me realise there’s more to life than a strict schedule.
Life started to get a little bit too repetitive and I really didn’t like it. It started to make me a little unhappy. I’d never felt that way before. Maybe I didn’t give myself time to feel that way before.
I felt this more than ever during the last few months at University, which is a time not much fun for anyone. I’d get up early and went to bed at ridiculous hours and never stopped all day long. I’d never give myself time to get in some me time. I’d say yes to every single plan I was offered, whilst knowing I had a tonne of work to get done for my dissertation and also wanting time to do things I love most, like blogging. Even reading a book was a no go. I literally got myself into a strict cycle and just kept going with it until it finally hit me in the face like a tonne of bricks.
I am so thankful for my holiday, I really am. It came just at the right time. As it gave me time to be offline and come to the realisation that I needed to slow down a little. I needed to give myself me time. I now know I need to stop when I want to stop. If that means changing up my routine, then so be it. Creating and experiencing a new looser routine has given me a clearer mind, which is what I’ve needed for a long time coming.
Don’t get me wrong, I will always be that organised person. Usually (not quite always) ready on time, never miss any plans and one to like getting sh*t done, but I’ve finally realised life shouldn’t get one big schedule. Nobody is perfect and sometimes we need to go off schedule to get back on again.
From now on I’m being more laid back with many things in life. My blog will be consistent still, but with a more sporadic blogging schedule as opposed to everyday. Some weeks may be everyday, some may be just a few posts. It feels good to be a little less strict on myself. Why didn’t I realise this before?!
Just know, it’s OK to take time off from your schedule. It’s OK to do things for you and it’s healthy to not be so strict on yourself. We’re all only human after all right?
If you enjoyed this post, why not read Getting Lost In Paradise?