As a blogger, writer, content creator and more, do you ever just sit there, laptop open and stare at a blank screen for a good few minutes? Those minutes then turn to hours and before you know it, the day is almost over and you’ve got not much (if anything you wanted to) done. Yeah? Me to. Don’t worry, I think we all go there at one point.
Just lately I’ve come to terms with the fact that it’s OK to not always have something to write, create or publish. It’s OK to not push yourself to create, edit and share content you’re not actually 100% proud of.
I’ve been there and done it, a few times as a matter of fact. I’ve been in the moment and hit publish on a post, an Instagram picture or a tweet I’m not fully comfortable or happy to share. If you’ve been there to, which I’m sure many of you have (we’re all human right?) then you’ll know the feeling. The dread and angst of feeling like what we do isn’t good enough, feeling that what we do isn’t as good as others.
Recently I found myself questioning my ability in many aspects in life, especially creating content. I was constantly asking myself why I’m not good enough, putting myself down or dwelling on the fact what I’m doing isn’t ‘the right thing to do’. All of this was down to one thing and one thing only – something I call my ex best friend, aka my phone.
I’m not here to dwell on the matter/issue/problem of ‘comparing oneself’, but I’m here to talk about how time is a virtue, but only when we let it be. In this case, wasting time dwelling on the unnecessary because my phone has led me to.
Many of us (‘millenial’s’ being the majority in this particular situation – ugh, I hate that word) rush our time, our efforts and what we create just to put something out there. Or, we use our time impractically and spend it scrolling our phones and doing anything we can to avoid getting anything done, even when we are feeling inspired – and that’s what I’m getting at here.
Of course, phones are just an object, a thing, a bit of metal. They can’t actually tell you what to do, but they sure make you feel that way don’t they?
I virtually let my phone take over my time, my day and my life.
I found myself being on my phone all the time. I’d look up after an hour and be like ‘eh, where’s the time gone? Why do my eyes feel so squinty? Why haven’t spoke a word in a v long time?’. It was crazy how much I relied on it to pass the time, catch up with other people’s lives and eventually, become more invested in others people happenings than my own.
That small little object can be your best friend when you want it to be. It’s always there isn’t it? When you’re bored, its there. When you’re lonely, its there. When you need a laugh, its there. But when you learn to become so reliant on it, it feels weird to let go. But, I needed to. I needed to let go and make it my ex best friend before it sent me a lil crazy.
I’m not saying I’ve given up my phone, it’s still always there when I want it but I’m not always on it. That’s the difference. I’m learning to live off of it and it feels good to go back to your phone after a few hours, even a whole day, and realise you’ve been productive, got shit done, feel good in yourself.
Another big thing I’ve noticed about not being on my phone all the damn time is that I used to be that person who would feel the need to reply to a text, tweet, message ASAP. If I didn’t reply within 5 minutes I’d feel bad or feel like the other person had lost interest. But if being on my phone was making me miserable why on earth did I continue to reply ASAP and care more about replying than myself.
As I say, time is our virtue. I was living in a routine, a very strict routine really when I think back, and it wasn’t good for me or anyone else. I’d spend all evening on my phone and let the time slip away, when that time could be spent enjoying someone’s company, my own company or just doing something different. If we let ourselves, our time can be spent how we want it when we have time. Don’t let your time slip away and be stuck behind your phone. It can be toxic, it is a time waster and it feels damn good to indulge in real life communication.
I wouldn’t be able to manage to give up my phone like some people do. Not whilst I’m at home anyway. I could easily turn my phone off for a week or more if I were travelling or on holiday, as long I had my camera to snap away. What I’m saying is I’m dedicating parts of the day to say goodbye to my phone and come offline when I want to, not just when I really need to.
Goodbye phone, or should I say ex best friend. Hello more me time, real time and real life.
— SHOP THE POST —