The Fear Of Missing Out… more commonly known or said as ‘fomo’. A term I’ve been relating to a heck of a lot lately. More than I used to anyway.
I admit it. Hands up high. I suffer with fomo.
Sometimes it will be caused by myself and my lack of ‘trying not to overthink what I see online’ a bit more. It also dawns upon me that it isn’t only me feeling this. It’s safe to say I’m not alone in this, as I see so many people everyday mention the term and their ‘fomo’ moments online. It isn’t something that can be easily forgotten either.
Not only have I become more familiar with what ‘fomo’ means but, it engrosses me more than I ever thought it would. It’s something I have let sit with me, overwhelm me and also let hurt my feelings. That’s not ok, I know its not. But I still let it happen from time to time. It’s a horrible feeling, it really is, but I can’t stop it. Who can?
Growing up I used to not care what I was missing out on. I was quite happy to let others and the world around me get on with what is was doing and I didn’t give a crap basically. If I was missing out on something, I didn’t care because I couldn’t see it.
I was quite dependent on myself as a kid and even as a teenager. I was happy to let others do what they do and not even dwell on the fact that I could be missing out on all the fun. Until, I got a bit older and social media came into my life and kind of made me realise ‘fomo’ exists. Only then I realised what ‘fun’ I am missing out on.
Silly really isn’t it? Why do I let it bother me when 30 seconds before seeing or overthinking it, I was perfectly fine. It all sounds quite childish really, doesn’t it?
Social media wants to make me a little bit selfish and realise what I am actually missing out on, when really I shouldn’t (and never used to) give two sh*ts.
Being selfish is not a bad thing. As humans we are accustomed to being selfish now and then, sometimes without even realising it. We have to at least be allowed to be selfish now and then don’t we? I certainly think so. It’s important to know how to put yourself first.
– SHOP THE LOOK –
PHOTOGRAPHY BY SARAH ELLEN TREACHER (@sarahellen_photography)
I think that’s the difference between me as a kid and now as an adult. I realise that being selfish is sometimes the only way to put myself and my happiness first. Things become a whole lot harder when you’re an adult. You have all those adulting responsibilities and thoughts, like paying the bills, remembering to put the bins out, cooking ya own dinner and all that fun stuff.
But also a lot more to deal with… like fomo (thanks social media lols). Jokes aside, I can’t really blame social media for 100% of my fomo feelings, but it does play a big influence. I mean, I couldn’t see what I was missing out on as a kid when I didn’t have a phone, SMS or funky old MSN at home on the family brick box computer. There wasn’t a constant timeline that I could access 24/7 to see what I was missing out on.
Now however, I can see it all the time. It is my decision when I go online of course, but it does become part and parcel of everyday life and I am online pretty much everyday. 1) because I love it and 2) I love being up to date with news and all things blogging and Instagram.
There was a point I turned into this ‘selfish’ person and I remember it very well. It was when I got Instagram and started to use it everyday, instead of when I uploaded an instant picture (those were the days). Selfish me then turned into someone who got jealous at what others were doing or had.
This idea, process, new ‘selfish thought’ soon felt more normal the older I got and the longer I used social media for. Until the realisation of stupidity hit and I came to terms with how idiotic it is to let others, what they have, do, say and more, affect my life. Fomo is a real thing, a stupid thing I know, but it sits with me more than it ever has. Is that down to social media? Meh, a huge part of it is yeah. But I’m the one to let it happen and my message is, although it feels very stupid it is real but it’s not a forever feeling.
Fomo, I’ve let you win numerous times. I’ve let you get me down and make me feel like crap, but you can’t win forever and it’s time to get my butt into gear and (maybe?) get back to the selfish ‘as long as I’m happy’ state I was once very fond of. *middle finger to the air* (or to fomo, I guess).